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July 5, 2007

Oops, I did it again...

Why, the baby isn't even safely harnessed!

Now, I'm fairly certain that if this was a picture of Britney Spears and her child it would already be the featured headline on N.B.C. and Fox News, the Reverend Jerry Falwell would be spinning in his freshly turned grave and C.N.N would be camped outside of our domestic compound demanding an explanation of how we could be so cavalier with the safety of our infant child.

Since it is only a picture of my wife, Felicia, in the privacy of our own home I am somewhat certain that we will not awaken to find that nappy-headed-media-ho, Reverend Al Sharpton, standing outside our house in the morning, claiming that this is a clear example of our society’s hypocrisy in how the suburban mother is treated differently than her inner city urban counterpart. Which oddly enough, brings me to tonight’s topical discourse; where the hell is Reverend Al Sharpton during the great public outcry over the commutation of Scooter Libby’s jail sentence by our beloved president, George W. Bush?

Could it be that Mr. Sharpton has already squandered his available spiritual currency by attacking only television personalities and a certain incarcerated female blond celebrity? After engaging in a rather mindless debate with an author, in which Al seemed only to challenge the title of the book, “God Is Not Great”, rather than present any type of logical rebuttal of the salient contents of the man’s position, could it be that the news cameras went looking for a fresh voice with genuine substance to put upon the television airwaves?

When Paris Hilton was prematurely released from jail, and big Al announced his intentions to travel to Los Angeles in protest of the inequities of their judicial system, it truly dawned upon me just what a shallow media hog he really is. Is Paris Hilton a legitimate adversary worthy of the intellectual sword wielded by the champion of justice and equality, Al Sharpton? Could it be that what he saw was nothing more than potential television cameras and titillating media coverage of an ebony and ivory version of beauty and the beast?

Al has spent a lot of time in the public eye lately at the expense of one television personality, one hotel heiress and an author with a juicy book title. He has promoted himself quite effectively while waving the banner of gawd about as if it were some sort of sacred Baptist talisman. It has been self-aggrandizement on a scale of Barnum and Bailey’s circus. Ah, but an interesting thing has been happening lately. The crowd has begun asking legitimate questions about your ministry.

Why aren’t you angry with the musical artists who fill our children with talk of gold, debauchery, wine and lascivious women? Why is it the only devils you see are pale skinned? Why is it only your opinion I hear and not the word of God?

Your answer was to stand in front of nameless steel and glass buildings with a bullhorn blaming the music industry for forcing young black artists to make records of hate. You did not mention a single individual’s name. You held no one accountable. You bowed down before the temple of mammon and kept your jewels safe. What a disgrace it was...

You have become enamored with your own self and have fallen into the trap of pride, which has ensnared greater men than yourself throughout the ages of biblical history. You sir are filled with hubris and are now lost in a wilderness of your own making. While you were attacking overly hyped windmills like Imus and Paris Hilton a new prophet began standing before the pillars of mighty institutions and demanding personal accountability and genuine change.

As always happens with old windbags such as Al Sharpton, who claim to be the sole protectors of our youth, when in fact they are the greatest dead weight holding them down, the divine force at work in the universe steps in and corrective measures are instituted to correct the situation. Remember the lesson of Kadesh Barnea, Mr. Sharpton? Remember how the adults all wailed about the youth needing to be protected from the giants in the land? Do you remember what transpired, Al?

LET ME REMIND YOU.

The adults walked in circles in the wilderness until they died off and it was the young people who walked into the Promised Land and took it for themselves. That's right, the very kids who the old leaders claimed couldn't take care of themselves let alone each other were the warriors who took the Promised Land when the elders lacked genuine faith.

There is a new voice in the land, Al. Can you hear it? It is the voice of Barack Obama and he is speaking to the young and they are hearing his message loud and clear. He is demanding personal accountability instead of media recognition. He is demanding service to the people and not just an audience of the masses.

Barack Obama is the new voice of the people Mr. Sharpton while you are now simply another tabloid character like that of Imus or Paris Hilton. You have become a fool, sir and it is now time for you to go walk your circles in the wilderness and allow serious young warriors like Mr. Obama to stand in the market square and speak the real truth of God. He is the real leader of your people into the future, not you Mr. Sharpton. Now, go on home, watch television and dream of your bygone glory days.


Really Al, Imus and Paris Hilton, what were you thinking?

Sorry, dude, but consider yourself rebuked in the name of the Lord.



10 Comments:

Blogger Dirk_Star said...

What? Did I say something offensive?

July 06, 2007 12:19 AM  
Blogger Dirk_Star said...

By the way Al, "People did not suffer for your career either."

July 06, 2007 12:33 AM  
Blogger Em said...

It is moments like this when I wish Al read your blog. He needs to know just how lame he really is.

And now I'm sending this photo to the National Enquirer. :)

July 06, 2007 9:51 AM  
Blogger I think you're crazy just like me said...

Know-it-all types with bibles in hands that stand a hollar don't get any respect from me, and truthfully I don't really know much about him. Also there seems to be a lack of self important blowhard religious weirdo's up here in Canada.

July 06, 2007 10:45 AM  
Blogger DNR said...

Ha ha you said “nappy-headed-media-ho”, very nice BTW!

But seriously, Barrack may be the voice of all young people not just ‘his people’ and maybe, just maybe the voice of the young at heart people too.

July 06, 2007 5:13 PM  
Blogger yinyang said...

Al Sharpton is just another psycho media whore. Nice Obama endorsement, though.

July 06, 2007 7:38 PM  
Blogger betmo said...

i truly want to believe in obama. he seems like a decent enough person- i just hope he isn't morphing into a politician as usual status quo kind of guy. i am still voting kucinich in the primaries. yes, i realize madame clinton is my state senator here in new york- but i am royally ticked that she is running for president. i like your blog- very well done :)

July 06, 2007 7:58 PM  
Blogger C-dell said...

I support obama, but I am not too certain of his ablity to win a presidential election. Read my post presidential

July 07, 2007 11:09 AM  
Anonymous crunchy carpets said...

You are rocking my world with these posts!!!
I love it!

Oh and check out http://www.wetcoastwomen.com/2007/talking-vs-acting-blogher/

and http://www.wetcoastwomen.com/2007/blogher-act/

My small contribution to shaking some sense into this planet...

and that is the BEST photo!!!

July 07, 2007 1:39 PM  
Blogger Craig D said...

Geez! I go on vacation and the dirkster comes outta retirement!

This reference to a garden utensil wearing a diaper on it's head has me confused, though.

And don't forget to claim your button, DUDE!

July 07, 2007 2:56 PM  

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