December 25, 2007

Blue, blue Christmas...

My father, born on Christmas day, died this afternoon at approximately 2 p.m. at Mercy Hospital in Springfield, Ohio. My niece, Melanie, whom I had not heard from in many years called to give me the news. Quite frankly, I was more excited to hear from my niece than I was saddened to hear about my father's passing.

No, don't be sad...

My father was a monster who beat me like I was a punching bag throughout my entire childhood until I ran away from home and never looked back. I carried scars of both the mental and physical type well into adulthood. Thanks to Felicia, my loving and wonderful wife, many of the scars I believed would never heal have at last begun to fade from the fabric of my heart and soul.

My family shattered many years ago and the pieces have never come back together, not even when my mother died. We are a terribly wounded and hurt group of individuals. Melanie was afraid to call me. Somehow reunions in my family are never wonderful and she feared, as I always do, opening the door to those we have avoided for so many decades. The pain is simply too much to risk. The hurt is always so slow to fade away.

She called and we talked...

When you have children it is funny how important family becomes. Melanie and I both know the sorrow of having no family at our weddings. We know far too well the pain at holidays of having to face the inevitable questions; Aren't you going to see your family? Why don't your family ever call? Why doesn't you ever talk about your family?. Yeah, it sucks hard.

We talked...

We exchanged addresses and phone numbers and vowed to show our children a different kind of family.

My father died. It was almost a relief...

I hope my son never feels such a thing.

I hope Melanie's children never feel such a thing.

Merry Christmas everyone. Please be good to each other.

It is so very important. Trust me, I know from personal experience...

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